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| Blogs > jambawoman > My Blog |
Solo Play
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Solo Play Master wants me to suck more cocks at the club the next time I go. "At least seven," He says, but I don't know if that's going to be possible to do there. There is a place in Spokane, however, that I might be able to do it if enough men come in. I do so enjoy sucking cocks, but that doesn't mean I want to suck just any man's cock. One man here wants me to suck his cock, no reciprocation whatsoever, just so he can get off. Who the fuck does he think he is? My Master? I told this guy to come to the club and I would play with him there, but truthfully, I don't expect to see him show up, and I'm fine with that. I love sucking cocks, but at the same time, I don't like being treated like a in the process, and I really don't want to play with someone who thinks that's all I'm good for. My Master doesn't see me that way, and I don't think anyone else should either. I do have more self-worth than what this man seems to think. I spent last night home alone with my toys. I can cum but have a difficult time with having an orgasm, but I'm working on that. I've been finding that I am becoming more sexually responsive to certain touches, but it's a process to retrain myself. I had shut down for so long that it got to the point where I couldn't feel a lot of touches and didn't respond. Now, I still have some problems feeling some things, but that isn't so much a mental block as it is a physical thing. It was so hot last night and I was so incredibly horny. I'd had a chance to talk with Master a little and I missed Him so much this weekend. No one can touch me the way He does. Actually, it was with Him that I first started realizing I could feel pleasure physically, and I'm incredibly grateful to Him for it. He'll never fully know what it's meant to me. I can only hope to be able to show Him my gratitude when I'm with Him. I went to bed and took my toys back to my room. I opened the bag and decided what toys I wanted to play with. Sensuality was what I wanted last night, so I took out a couple of vibrators, the nipple clamps, feather duster, chenille mitt, flogger, blindfold, and clit stimulator gel. I wanted to solely focus on the sensations. I started by putting the blindfold on and stroking my tits at first and I began to see where the changes were in terms of what I could and couldn't feel. The upper slopes can feel the soft touches, gentle kisses, tenderness, but the lower parts can't. I have to be rougher there, and I took the time to twist and pull on my nipples hard, pulling them away from my body so I could feel the pain. I could feel myself breathing in deeper with each tug and twist, and I could also feel my pussy getting wetter as well. I took the clamps out and put them on and I could feel them biting into the nipples more. The ones I used are the third pair I have bought, but these are the ones that work. I used one hand to pull on the chain a little to tighten them even more while I used the other hand to stroke the upper slopes. Then I started touching my sides and stomach. I can feel light touches there, and I found that I prefer soft caresses. The same is true for my back and shoulders. Harder touches with the hands hurt, but the flogger on them felt good. I can't explain why, other than the texture or force, but I enjoyed whipping my shoulders with the flogger and could feel them heating up with each lash. I rolled over onto my side and stroked my ass, feeling the soft flesh and I squeezed hard. I could feel the muscle respond to my pressure and I could also feel my body tightening, wanting more. I stood up and took the flogger to my ass, bringing it down as hard as I could from side to side. It's nowhere near as hard as Master can do it, but then again, I'm also not in the right position to get the right angle and downswing either. Still, it felt good and I could feel my ass heating up as well and getting redder. I laid back down on the bed and took the mitt to my ass, stroking it softly, allowing myself to feel the gentle texture of the mitt, the pressure of my hand in it, and I could feel my hips beginning to move slightly, wanting more, so I got out the third vibrator and slid it into my ass and turned it on high. I then rolled back over onto my back, making sure I had the towels placed beneath my hips and started stroking my outer lips. I could feel their softness and also thought I need to shave again, but that can wait for the time being. I tugged on the little hairs that I had just started growing back and could feel a little pain, but nothing that wasn't enjoyable. I reached in further and felt the inner lips and how they were starting to respond, to enlarge, and I slipped a finger inside my pussy. It was really starting to get wet, and I couldn't help but bring my finger to my lips so I could taste it. I took a little of the clit stimulator gel and worked it onto my clit and could instantly feel it heating up. Then I took the G-spot vibrator and slid it inside my pussy while I took the little gold one and worked on my clit. Sometimes I would put it aside and work my clit with my fingers. I've been finding I'm getting more responsive that way. I used to do a lot handwork before and could never get myself to this point before, so I know the training is working. My walls are coming down and I can feel myself being able to physically respond more. I could feel my hips moving back and forth, fucking into the vibrator. I went back to using the gold vibrator, using it to stroke along my clit, and I could feel myself approaching the edge. My hips kept thrusting back and forth and I bore down hard and released. I could feel the fluids running down my legs, soaking into the toweling beneath me and then I could feel my pussy starting to throb and I could hear these little moans of delight. I never used to make sounds before. I used to share a bedroom with my sister growing up and my parents were right across the hall. We always slept with our doors opened, so I learned early on to bed VERY quiet, and it's only been these past few months that I've been able to make any sounds, to verbally release what I feel inside, and it makes it that much more pleasurable, that much more intense. I could feel myself cumming hard and it was such a release. It was nowhere as good as it would have been with my Master, but I'll take what I can when I can, even it's when I'm alone. Either way, I ended up completely soaked with sweat and had to take a shower to cool down before I could go to sleep. I had soaked through 4 layers of toweling into the bed and had to clean the bed a little before going to bed, but it was definitely worth it and I slept so much better. |
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6/5/2009 5:10 am |
very nice
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